Sweet Revenge

I and my neighbor had a misunderstanding over a minor topic

Uncle took it personal

Stopped greeting me, and even stopped answering my greeting

I wasn't pained, after all salutation isn't love, and besides, who greeting epp

The one that pained me is the fact that since our quarrel, he always comes back with bread for everybody in the compound except me

And he knows I love bread 

In fact, I love bread die

Bread is my best food

This uncle works in a bakery close to our compound, the biggest, where they sell the only kind of bread I eat

Sardine bread

The one that shocked me is that he stopped selling bread to me, and told his colleagues not to sell to me

It was that bad

Any time I go there to buy bread, if he is the one selling, he will tell me it has finished 

I will be seeing the hot, sizzling, fresh, sweet smelling, rich, succulent and Juicy bread with my two eyes 

Uncle will tell me it has finished 

Or it has expired, I will be like, give me like that, he will refuse and say it has spoilt even though the bread is positioned there on the shelf

If he is not on seat, his colleagues will refuse to sell to me because he is their boss

Even if I send someone to buy, somehow he will know and not sell 

As if he uses jazz

So I plotted my revenge 

I work in Nepa office on the island, so based on who I be, I worked my transfer to the mainland 

I began heading the Ikeja Electric distribution company in no time 

Now since I began heading the Ikeja branch, I have not given him light for one week 

Whenever he comes to complain, I will keep him in the receptionist until he will get tired and go

He can't call electrician because I will know since I'm his neighbor, and I will arrest him

So I will give everyone light in the compound except him

When he came to my room after two weeks, begging and pleading

I told him from my window that there is no light 

Even though he could see the light everywhere, I told him with a pokerface that light has finished everywhere 

He could literally see my TV on and all the light bulbs shining in my house and everywhere else, yet I told him light has finished 

The next day he blocked me on my way to work, and knelt down, I told him light has spoilt even though he could see that there was still light

I started seeing bread in front of my house every evening when I returned from work 

Sardine bread 

I will collect and eat, yet I still won't give him light

I have eaten free bread for 1 month now, yet I still refused to give him light

Revenge is sweet when served cold 

Now, guess what

I just heard from a neighbor that uncle has quit his job in the bakery, and joined the Nigerian police

I have run to a friend's house far away from the compound for the main time 

But I have not given up

I am thinking of quitting my job too, and joining the Nigerian army or... 

Maybe I'll become a doctor, so I will give him malaria or Covid19, and refuse to treat him

You can be anything in this life with the right push

Nonsense and ingredient

The End

Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne