When I was little I had a dream and in my dream, I was travelling to English, yeah you heard me right, English, and it existed because in a dream everything exists and I was going to go in a ship, a white ship. I was all dressed up in white like a sailor, it was all so surreal and it was happening because that's the beauty of dreams, impossibility is nothing in dreams because anything can happen when you are dreaming.
You can grow wings, you can fall or jump from a skyscraper and survive, you can fight monsters with swords and rule a kingdom.
That is how relationships should be to you, A dream.
What does the word relationship mean to you?
When you are in a relationship, is it all about you having someone to visit when you are bored, broke or horny?
Do you as a lady, just get there cook, clean, have sex, then ask for money for clothes, shoes, a new wig, bags and other basic needs then transport fare to go back home?
As a guy, is it having a girl to call when you are horny, lonely or just to show off?
Do you just invite her to cook for you, have sex, listen to her needs and then be A MAN and meet those needs with money while DASHING her transport fare as an incentive to probably invite her over again for the weekend to club, drink, dance and have mind blowing sex. Is that the summary of your relationship?
Or is it someone you can dream with, someone to think about when you pass by a shop and stop to think how good that shirt or tie on that mannequin would look on him or how that black dress or red gown will fit perfectly on her body.
Do you stop by the trader selling by the road side on your way back from church or work and pick up the nice shoes that caught your eyes without thinking of yourself but your partner, or discuss renting that empty shop for you both to open a boutique since you both love fashion or plan to start a business together?
Relationship goals are never scored with the mentality of playing together, NO!
Relationship goals are possible if you don't mind playing alone to win for the team without having to wait for your partner to get in shape first.
Don't make relationship goals but build a relationship that is scoring.
Goals go but scoring continues.
Goals end but scoring never stops.
Have a relationship that scores not just relationship goals.
Do you do a good deed with the mentality of a reward or you do a good deed with the mentality that it is the reward your partner deserves for sticking with you?
At the end, relationship is not about give and take, it's not about giving sex in exchange for money or meeting needs in exchange for sex. It is a giving. A give give situation not a give and take... NO!
Even the Bible says it is more blessed to give than to receive, therefore it means a relationship that is based on giving is blessed, that is a relationship that is not selfish but selfless, where a woman thinks about how her man can be better than he is without thinking about how he can make her better, look better and feel better.
Where a man wants his woman to look better, talk better and be better for herself not because he wants to feel good having a beautiful woman beside him to make him the envy of his friends but because he wants her to be a Queen and a cynosure of all eyes because he knows she is one.
Find that person who is more interested in sleeping with you much more than on you. Yes I repeat, find someone who sleeps with you and not only on you.
Find the one who will pass the night and stay the day not just someone who will pass the night and go away.
Don't go into a relationship halfway because you are scared it might end else you will never feel or be complete.
Go into a relationship like a suicide bomber, go in with a blast. Go in and make noise like it's your last and final one and give your all irrespective of the outcome.
Stop thinking about the outcome but think only about the output.
Don't concern yourself thinking if he or she is going to marry you but focus on why you decided to give them a chance, focus on how the relationship has affected and made you both better than you were before you started, the changes that has transpired over time. Output over outcome.
Give your all and in the end if it breaks up then wake up, stretch long, go out there and dream again.
There can be no end to your dreams, so there shouldn't be an end to your relationship.
If it doesn't workout, don't stop dreaming.
Dreams are endless, when you have a nightmare you don't quit sleeping, No, you sleep again and maybe the next one will be a Sweet dream.
You don't quit relationships because you had a bad experience, if it breaks, you wake up and find someone new and dream again until you find that person that shares your dream and then together you both can have sweet dreams and fight your nightmares together when they come because as long as you are dreaming, you are gonna have both nightmares and sweet dreams but then with the right partner, you are sure to feel safe even when you have nightmares.
Like a good friend will say, "Relationships are important but your relationship is importanter."
The End
Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne
Authorpreneur
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