Over the weekend, I had a lot of ideas running through my mind.
So I quickly wrote them out, and on Monday morning, I sent them to a colleague and close friend, whose Job was to implement and execute.
I sent them to get her input and feedback, so we could brainstorm and move forward with it.
We work together, she's a programmer and I'm a website manager/brand director.
So I was in the middle of a morning prayer meeting when my phone beeped and vibrated.
During the break, I quickly checked, lo and behold it was her reply on WhatsApp.
Her response was shocking, she told me to send a report in no subtle terms.
I was deflated and very pissed!
My first reaction was to quickly call her out, and give her a piece of my mind.
A piece of my mind in that state would have torn her to pieces.
But I was praying...
I already started responding on WhatsApp with words like, "You don't think and when someone else does, you try to shove their ideas and effort under the carpet instead of taking action first.... you are waiting to send report, probably that's why you are where you are after putting in so many years and I am where I am, without being here for as long as you have. Etc"
But we were in the mood of prayer, and I had to stop and join the prayer because what I wanted to tell her was a lot, and I didn't wanna appear like the phone addict who can't even give God some minutes of his precious time.
I was distracted by anger!
I could hardly concentrate and kept on rehearsing the venom I felt like spitting out on her.
But the more I prayed and allowed time to pass, the lesser the anger felt towards her lingered.
Soon I wasn't consumed anymore.
Infact at some point, I forgot about it.
After the prayers, I went back to my seat and plugged in my earpiece.
I let the music take over and totally forgot about her.
An hour later, someone breezed in smiling and tapping me.
I returned the smile, halfway.
I am at that point in my life where if I have a problem with you, I won't pretend we are comrades and buddies.
I will quickly tell you my mind and we would address the situation once and for all.
Or I would ignore you if it's better, and we wouldn't have the camaraderie we were used to until we had both ironed out our differences.
I wouldn't smile outside and hate you inside.
I hate pretenses!
So quickly I told her to sit, and then I said...
"You know, the way we talk at times matters a lot, and our manner of approach is key in proving our maturity and mettle when building relationships."
Immediately she apologized...
She's smart and not stupid!
She knew where I was headed
And she met me half way
And besides my intro was bae!!!
I didn't attack her, I didn't bad mouth her, instead I went in with the wisdom of Solomon.
So she explained and told me she was in a bad mood that morning and had an unpleasant incident on her way to work.
Also, her supervisor was a difficult preek, and always wanted to have his say in every little thing she does, and I's dotted!
Her explanations made perfect sense.
She brought her meal out as usual and shared with me.
I ate and we laughed.
And then talked some more until we reached a consensus.
I sent the ideas nonetheless without sending a report.
She executed it and we were both applauded by the Ogas at the top.
Then the report came afterward.
Again I was applauded for my quick and sharp thinking.
Later at night after we both walked to the bus stop and she left for her destination, leaving me to wait for the vehicle that will take me to mine.
I paused and reflected about how bad the events of the day would have gone if perhaps, I didn't wait and instead sent the missiles I had wanted to.
There were so many ways that the situation would have escalated.
But I kept it none confrontational from the go.
Because I waited.
I felt terrible even thinking the way I did.
If I could feel this way despite not sending it out, imagine how I would have felt if I had sent it out.
I whispered my thanks to God and entered the bus as it came around to where I stood.
In my thoughts, I didn't know I had entered the wrong bus heading to another destination due to the similarities in the pronunciation.
At first, I thought it was a short cut, perhaps another route the driver needed to take to beat the Lagos nightmarish traffic.
When I discovered it was an entirely different route
I didn't waste time in giving the conductor a piece of my mind.
This one deserved it and no explanation would justify this wickedness to me.
Anyways I got home 2 hours later for a ride that usually lasted 30 minutes.
Learn to stop things from reaching their boiling point and always keep them none confrontational.
Except for Lagos drivers and conductors!
If you wait before acting, it might be too late for you.
I didn't pay them though, they called me a mad man and for the first time, I believed them because, in this Lagos, we are all mad las las.
Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne
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